My Inspiration of the Day
I love my children so much I feel at times, my heart is literally going to explode. I want to literally eat them up at times. When they arrive in your arms, your heart becomes this room with wide open windows. You laugh harder, you think about global warming for the first time and the political involvement you should be having, you realize that you care about someone more than yourself for once, and slowly, you start to see the world more. It can be a hard life, but I feel that mine is a truely beautiful life mostly. Mostly because of my daughter Ellie.
Now is that a smile or what? When you ask her to smile, she can't help but cheese out like that. She literally lights up the room when you are with her. She has a casualness about her that is intoxicting. She has literally changed our lives. I know, that all mom's would say, that's what motherhood does to you, your once childless life, is forever changed when that precious little one comes into your life. Living with Ellie is different, my life has forever been changed..
Ellie has Epilepsy. She was diagnosed at one year of age. She over the years has contributed to a ton of my grey hairs. Seizures at night, seiures in the pool, 20 minute seizures that feel like eternity. Not being able to leave her alone, not feeling like anyone but myself can watch her. Annoying people asking me what's wrong with her when she is screaming and having one of her tantrums or when she is little and your at the grocery store and all of a sudden she has a seizure and you can't get her out of the cart cause shes so rigid. But there's this amazing side that you also get, you get people in town that recognize her, that I don't even recognize, they come up to you and make a point of saying hello to her. Who are these people anyway? You get animals that are literally attacted to her, it's like she's a magnet for the furry creatures. You get to answer these amazing questions that you didn't think about. What you get is Ellie.
Life is funny isn't it? I guess I have the thought that you have two options, give into it and let it become your whoes-me, terrible ever after or you embrace it and you get this beautiful gift. That's our Ellie, our beautiful gift.